My Therapy – How EFT May Help

Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) is a well-researched approach to couples counselling. International studies have found that many couples experience improvement in their relationship after participating in EFT. The focus of this therapy is on strengthening emotional bonds, improving communication, and fostering greater trust and connection. While outcomes vary for each couple, EFT provides a structured and supportive process that can assist partners in working through conflict and building a stronger relationship.

Reference:
Johnson, S. M., Hunsley, J., Greenberg, L., & Schindler, D. (1999). Emotionally focused couples therapy: Status and challenges. Clinical Psychology: Science and Practice, 6(1), 67–79.
Johnson, S. M. (2004). The practice of emotionally focused couple therapy: Creating connection (2nd ed.). New York: Brunner-Routledge.

Some specific skills Couples Can Learn in Therapy: 

Skills Couples Can Learn in Therapy

  • Deep Listening & Validation – learning to truly hear your partner’s perspective and acknowledge their feelings.

  • Breaking Negative Cycles – recognising and shifting the patterns of blame, withdrawal, or defensiveness that keep couples stuck.

  • Expressing Needs Safely – finding clear and respectful ways to share your needs without escalating conflict.

  • Building Emotional Safety – creating an environment where both partners feel secure, valued, and respected.

  • Reconnecting with Empathy – developing the ability to step into your partner’s world and respond with understanding.

  • Strengthening Intimacy – rebuilding trust, closeness, and a sense of partnership through structured dialogue and connection exercises.

What to expect on your first visit?

Your first therapy session has two main goals:

1. Assess Circumstance:

In our first session, we will take time to understand your relationship and the challenges you are facing. I will ask about your history as a couple, the patterns you notice in your communication, and the specific concerns that brought you to therapy. Together, we will assess your circumstances and identify your goals. This session also allows us to see whether we are the right therapeutic fit. From there, we can begin shaping a plan that supports both partners and provides a path forward.

2. The Therapeutic Relationship and Your Relationship

In couples therapy, there are two relationships at work. The first is the therapeutic relationship between you and your psychologist. This provides a safe, supportive, and confidential space where honesty, respect, and compassion guide the work we do together. The strength of this professional relationship is an important factor in creating positive outcomes.

The second is the relationship between you and your partner. Our sessions focus on helping you both communicate more clearly, listen more deeply, and reconnect with empathy. By practicing these skills in therapy, couples begin to shift negative patterns and build a stronger, more intentional bond outside of sessions.

Your first session is an opportunity for both of you to share what has brought you to therapy and what you hope to achieve. I will ask questions about your relationship history, current challenges, and the patterns you notice between you. This helps me understand your circumstances and gives you the chance to see how I work.

The first session is also a two-way conversation — just as I am getting to know you, you are welcome to ask me questions to ensure we are a good therapeutic fit. From here, we begin to identify your goals and start shaping a plan that reflects your shared values and daily realities. The focus is on creating a safe, supportive, and intentional foundation for the work ahead.

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I look forward to getting to know you and helping you reach your therapy goals.

Please complete the following forms prior to your first therapy session.

Is therapy confidential?

As a general rule, all therapy sessions are confidential and anything you discuss with your therapist will remain between the two of you, unless you request otherwise. This is as per protection rules by law, which all therapists legally need to follow, and no information from the session can be disclosed without prior written consent from the client.

There are exceptions to this law however, and the therapist can disclose information from the session to legal authorities or appointed persons if any of the following are true:

  • The therapist suspects abuse to a child, dependent adult, or an elder, or are made aware of domestic abuse. These situations all require the therapist to notify law authorities immediately.
  • If the therapist suspects an individual has caused, or is threatening to cause severe bodily harm to another person, therapists are required to report it to the police.
  • If an individual intends to harm himself or herself, expressing to the therapist for example, plans for suicide. While the therapist will attempt to work through this in the therapy session, if it appears to be unresolved or the client does not cooperate, additional action may need to be taken to ensure the safety of the client.